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Tuesday, January 23, 2007
What i don't go to school for
I'm listening to Radiohead's Creep now, which kinda sets a very appropriate mood. I am actually sick, but it's not the real reason why i didn't go to school today. I think i decided not to go today to take a step back and just look at what's going on in my life this year. Guess it started out okay, but within a few weeks it sorta degenerated. Below is a list of the stuff that's been bothering me over the last few weeks everytime i step into RJC.
- I shouldn't go to school and have to worry about birthday celebrations, class politics and various 'emo' situations going on with other people. I won't go into any specifics because it's not that i really have anything against all of this, it's just that it's not something i want a part of in school.
- I shouldn't go to school and have to worry about keeping the faith.
- I shouldn't go to school and have to worry about people that don't concern me, such as the J1s. I made a very big mistake yesterday and the week before attending the Raffles Rock auditions, and while I got to listen to nice music sometimes, more often than not it was total crap. Not to mention having to sit through long drawn out meetings involving people with the attention span of flies.
- I shouldn't go to school and have to worry about money. Everybody should be able to live on a $4-5/day allowance, because that is all you SHOULD ever need. Money is something the grown-ups worry about, not us.
- I shouldn't go to school and have to worry about families. Not mine specifically, but those of people near me.
- I shouldn't go to school and have to worry about friends that are drifting away, becoming different people than when i first met them, or going into other social groups and not bothering to keep in contact. They arn't really worth it, honestly. Need to keep reminding myself that, though.
- I shouldn't go to school and have to worry about things/events simply because i'm put in a position to. For this year i vow not to become involved in anything major that doesn't involve music (my music), literature or gaming.
Put simply, I feel i'm not selfish enough. (o.O) I don't mean that in a 'Ha! all the cookies are mine!' kind of way, but i think i should start putting my own interests, and the interests of those closer to me, like my family and my girl, first. This actually shouldn't change the way i act in any way, but more the way i think. I only know of 2 groups of people that come here, so i'll just disclaimer them seperately.
4I : ... Actually there's no need to disclaimer you people. This shouldn't be anything new to y'all.
A01D : Apologies if this offends any of you guys in any way. Carry on the way you always have, it's nice to see such enthusiasm in so many things. It's simply a little too much for me though.
Elizabeth : (Nice try, other readers)
Moca wrote @ 10:54 AM
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